Technology is supposed to make things easier. But ask any single man or woman, and they'll likely tell you dating apps do nothing to make dating easier. Sure, the process is simple: You swipe, you match, you message ... but that's when things go wrong.
We asked 1,400 women: “What's the worst online dating mistake men make?” In their eyes, sexting too soon is by far the biggest offense, but it's not the only thing that can turn women off. Your conversation skills also need some work, and some of you just need to ask her out already!
Score more dates—maybe even one that leads to a relationship—by trading the following mistakes for better, smoother moves.
Mistake #1: You Lead With a Sext
Opening with dirty talk might work if she’s only after a hookup, but if you're looking for a woman who wants something more, this is a surefire way to turn her off. Sixty-one percent of our poll respondents said this is their biggest gripe about online dating and apps.
While you may think you're just being flirty, she'd prefer to establish a connection first.
“More men than women look for physical attraction right away. But women who seek relationships want to connect with men on multiple levels,” says Laurie Davis, founder and CEO of eFlirt.
And if all you do is send dick pics or even ask seemingly innocent things like “Are you a good kisser?” she'll think all you want is sex.
A better move: “Imagine you are walking up to a woman in a bar and saying hello,” Davis says. “What would you say in that circumstance? That's what you should say on an app.” And if you still haven’t figured out what to say in a bar, here are some ideas.
The advantage of an app over the bar is that you usually have more information to work off of. So check out her profile. If you see she has a photo of herself in a race, ask about it: “I see you love running. What race is that?” Or if she mentions she loves sushi, say, “Tuna or California roll?”
“Find some connection point and ask her a question to get the conversation started,” Davis says, adding that two lines tends to be the best length for an opener.